HPEP Switches Monthly Munch

Monthly switches confab, fatchew, and whacko time

So… many of us Switches identify as sadomasochists because we cause and receive pain.
But does it squick you a bit if the person you are Topping hates pain, and isn’t turned on by it ?
If you do not get turned on by being hurt by your Top when you bottom…?
It seems like a true Sadist would love it if their bottom was in misery, and let them know that they hated every minute of it.
Wouldn’t they just eat that shit up ?
And if we ‘take it’ for someone, when it hurts like hell and we aren’t getting turned on by the torture ?
Are you really doing it for yourself, or is it to please your play partner
(ie: Service playing) ?
Maybe because you don’t give a damn whether they like it or not… you’re getting your jollies !!!
Or is it to enjoy the dance, the connection, the pleasure of giving and receiving pleasure, because you are both doing what you enjoy with each other…?
I say, if I’m having fun, it’s not ‘service’ Topping or bottoming, it’s Sensualism on both sides.
No matter how bland, or how rough it gets, is it not really Sadism or masochism if you are playing TO Your Partner, and not all for yourself ?
Agree ? Disagree ?
Would you like to come and talk about this at Switches ?
Or should I say… Get your ass over here and tell me, dammit !!!